


Patience, Compassion, and Friendship

by orphan_account



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Blood, Break Up, Broken Promises, Caring, Charity Auctions, Coffee, Coffee Addict Tony Stark, Coffee Shops, College, Comfort/Angst, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feelings, Fist Fights, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Happy Ending, Healing, Heartbreak, Lies, M/M, Male Friendship, No Sex, No Smut, Post Break Up, Rumors, Snacks & Snack Food, SteveTonyFest, Students, Terminal Illnesses, Tony Angst, Tony Stark Has Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-16
Updated: 2013-06-16
Packaged: 2017-12-15 03:04:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/844569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A college AU in which Steve Rogers is smitten with Tony Stark, his fellow student at Shield University and the founder of "Heroes for Hope," a non-profit organization. After Tony is left with a broken heart, the two become fast friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fiftyshadesofstony](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fiftyshadesofstony/gifts), [shyora](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shyora/gifts).



> Dedicated to my best friend Emily and my girlfriend Katie. Without your encouragement, I would've scrapped this fic. I'm so glad that I didn't. I love you both, always and forever <3.

“Tony, what’s up? You looked angry in class and I just figured I’d check up on you,” Steve placed his hand on Tony’s right shoulder to catch his attention as they walked out of their geography class.

Steve knew this was his one chance at starting an actual conversation with Tony Stark. While they had talked a few times in person, it was always a “hello” or “how are you?” Nothing more, nothing less. He met Tony five months ago, and while he desperately wanted to get to know him and possibly form a friendship he never could find the words to say. On occasion Tony was even nice enough to wave hello to Steve when he saw him in the hallway, but only when he wasn’t indulging in a Trenta sized cup of piping hot coffee from the Starbucks on campus. Much to Steve’s disappointment that was 99.999% of the time, so he was rarely acknowledged.

The first time Steve ever saw Tony was when his best friend, Clint Barton, invited him to watch the school’s annual drag race for charity that took place in April. The charity, called Heroes for Hope, was where average, everyday teen and adult volunteers dressed up in superhero costumes and visited terminally ill children. They bought the children strong enough to be active a costume of their own and took them to a park designated for the program, where they pretended they were superheroes for a day. There were good guys and bad guys, and the sick children “took down” the evildoers and were given a medal for their bravery. The little ones who were too weak were paid a visit by the superhero volunteers, and they spent some time playing games or just talking; these children were also given a medal for being brave so as not to be excluded. The volunteers were put into an online directory, and children could choose from the wide variety of heroes available on a national level, though only adult volunteers were allowed to travel out of state (all expenses paid of course).

No one was exactly sure why Tony started the charity, but he had billions of dollars left to him by his deceased parents, who passed away in a horrific car accident. As a result, he had more than enough money to start up the non-profit organization and make a difference in the world. Everyone at Shield University chipped in to help with the charity event, and after the start-up year of the event the drag race earned one hundred thousand dollars or more. Heroes for Hope had only been around for three years, but it had gained national attention and spread to every state.

At the time, Steve was a sophomore, and he had never seen a drag race in his life. He had no idea what to expect, but Clint begged him to come along. Clint was thinking about competing in the race the next year, and he wanted to see if it was worth the time and effort working on a car to compete. He didn’t want to look like the poor chump who had to go alone, however, as his girlfriend Natasha was currently studying abroad in Russia. Steve didn’t want to leave his friend hanging, so he happily agreed. So they bought Heroes for Hope t-shirts that were being sold outside at a table outside of the cafeteria and went to the event, hoping that it was as good as people made it out to be.

Steve and Clint were impressed when they went to the charity event; there were thousands of people, news reporters from all over the state, concession stand after concession stand, and an impressive number of people were competing. The event was a full day affair, and luckily it was held at a race track an hour away, keeping the university safe from liability and an overabundance of litter that was sure to come. The two friends took a charter bus to the drag racing competition; for ten dollars students could board the bus, giving everyone a chance to enjoy the show and donate to Heroes for Hope.

The moment Steve saw Tony stand in the middle of the racetrack on an elevated platform with a mike in hand, he was instantly smitten. While he couldn’t see him close up because they were in the nosebleeds of the stands, Steve saw him on one of the large monitors nearby. As Tony gave his speech, Steve was absolutely convinced that Tony cared about the wellbeing of the kids he raised money to help. He spoke casually but passionately at the same time, and it was hard for the audience to contain their screams. People were holding up signs in support of him and his charity, and Steve couldn’t believe that one student at Shield University could be given so much love by people who didn’t even know him.

 Not only did Tony seem to care a lot about children who were struggling, but he was gorgeous; Steve was always attracted to tall brunets, and Tony was in peak physical condition. He looked handsome in his red racing suit with gold sleeves and pant legs, and there was a shiny blue circle with “Team Stark” written on it. Clint immediately noticed how dazzled Steve was by Tony’s appearance, and after he finished chuckling for what seemed like ages he told Steve that he would be able to introduce him to Tony. He had Engineering 202 with Tony, and they had talked numerous times in class. Clint assured Steve that Tony was a good guy with a great sense of humor, and Steve could feel his heart race in his chest. Steve didn’t know why, but he felt like something was going to come out of meeting Tony.

After Tony won the first place ribbon in the drag race and people began to leave the track, Clint took Steve to meet him. Steve couldn’t wait to meet Tony; it had been two years since he found anyone attractive after his foreign exchange student boyfriend, Thor, had to go back to his home country. The distance was too much for either of them to take, and they split up a month after Thor left the States. Steve felt a wave of hope overtake him, even though he knew it wasn’t always the best idea to get his hopes up. After all, they had never met before, and Steve didn’t even know if Tony was as good of a person as Clint made him out to be. Those thoughts were pushed out of his mind however, and his heart sank when they finally approached Tony.

Tony’s fingers were intertwined with a brunet shorter than he, and he was a bit on the thin side. They were kissing each other, and Steve could tell between each kiss the other man was congratulating him and telling him he loved him. Steve instantly felt jealous, though he knew there was no rational basis for this; he had never met Tony before in his life and he had no right to feel envious. He couldn’t help it, however, and when Clint and Steve approached them the smaller brunet and Tony stopped what they were doing and shook hands with Clint.

Clint introduced Steve to Tony, and then the other man, whose name was Bruce Banner. Steve shook both of their hands, and Tony began talking all about the race and why his car was vastly superior to everyone else’s. Even though it was clear that Tony had far more money than everyone else, it turned out that he had actually put a cap on how much contestants could spend suping up their cars, and even he played by the rules. Steve respected that about Tony, and the more Tony talked the more he wanted him. It was obvious that Tony was infatuated with Bruce, however, as they continued to hold hands and look lovingly at each other from time to time during the conversation.

In the months that followed, Steve saw Tony with Bruce less and less frequently. It didn’t appear that they were even in a relationship anymore, but Steve knew that wasn’t the case. In their Geography 202 class, Tony sat only a chair away from him, and Steve saw that he was still wearing a promise ring. Steve knew the two were serious about their relationship, and while it hurt him to admit it Steve couldn’t help but be happy for them; if Steve couldn’t have Tony, then Bruce was the next best thing. As long as Tony looked content, then Steve felt the same.

One day, however, Tony stormed into class early, which normally wasn’t his style; he often came into class late. He hurried to his seat, slammed his books down and leaned back in his chair. He ran his hands through his hair before putting them behind his head, and Steve noticed that Tony’s promise ring was no longer on. Steve quickly realized what had happened, and instead of feeling relieved that Tony’s relationship had ended he felt sad and worried about his wellbeing. Throughout class Tony had his phone under his desk the whole time, and he was texting someone, which Steve presumed to be Bruce. Each time a Tony got a text back Steve noticed that Tony’s eyes began to water and that he was fighting back tears a bit. He wasn’t sure if they were from anger or devastation, but Steve figured it was a mixture of both. Being broken up with was not by any means pleasant, and the fact that Tony and Bruce had been together for three years, according to Clint, must have made it truly heartbreaking.

Steve knew he had to do something, and he decided that as soon as class was over he would reach out to Tony and offer his help. They were acquaintances after all, and Tony was one of Clint’s good friends. Even if Tony refused to talk to him, at least he would know that Steve genuinely was concerned about him and he might decide to come to him later if he was upset. As soon as class got out, Steve rushed after Tony and put his hand on Tony’s shoulder so they could have a discussion.

“Oh, hey Steve. Yeah, yeah, I’m just fine. Just tired is all. You know how engineering students are; we never sleep. I forgot to get my coffee this morning so yeah, I’m just not running on all cylinders today. You know how it goes, what with the fact that you probably stay up late some nights to work on paintings or whatever the hell else you art majors do,” Tony shrugged his shoulders, pretending to be indifferent, but Steve could tell Tony was miserable.

“Since you didn’t get your coffee this morning, let’s get some together. I was planning on getting some tea anyway. Come on, I’ll buy,” Steve stated rather than asked, and Tony wasn’t in the mood to argue with anyone; he was far too hurt to tell Steve no.

As they walked to Starbucks, Tony wiped away tears on his sweatshirt, though he tried to pretend that his nose was just runny. He told Steve that he was battling a bit of a cold, but it was obvious that he was lying through his teeth. Steve could tell Tony was a man of pride and that he hated appearing weak, which Steve easily related to. When Thor broke up with him ages ago, Steve was devastated but he wouldn’t let anyone in or talk about his pain. He only allowed himself to cry in the shower where no one would be able to hear him, and the moment Steve stepped out he was able to put his normal, serious face back on. Unlike Tony, however, Steve was a master of masking his emotions. In a way, Steve wished he was able to feel emotionally the way Tony did. It had been so long since he’d even shed a tear, and sometimes Steve wished he could.

“Thanks for the coffee, Steve. I appreciate it… I’m going to go for a drive. If you want to come I guess you can. I mean since you bought me something I don’t want to leave you hanging,” Tony said hesitantly as he picked up his black coffee and Steve’s chai tea latte and handed it to his acquaintance.

“I don’t really want to impose on you Tony. You don’t need to feel obligated to hang out with me; I just bought you coffee, it’s not much. Here, let me give you my number. If you want to hang out text or call me anytime,” Steve answered with a kind smile, and the two exchanged numbers before Tony took off out of the double doors with his coffee.

Steve spent the rest of the day worrying about Tony; he prayed to God that Tony wouldn’t get hurt on his drive because he was upset. He knew that people were prone to road rage when they were emotional, and while he wasn’t sure if Tony was one of those people Steve could tell he was a risk taker. After all, he loved drag racing and left people in the dust. Every few minutes, Steve would check his phone to see if Tony had texted him. He knew that there was no way Tony would bother to talk to him, and all Steve could do was show his concern. He never got a text that day or that night, so Steve went to bed at two in the morning, though he was unable to sleep. All he could think about was how upset Tony must be, and while he wanted to ask him if he was okay Steve felt it was best to leave him be.

A week later, Steve was half an hour late to geography because he had a meeting with an academic advisor. When he quietly walked into the room and took great care not to let the door slam, Steve noticed that Tony wasn’t in his seat. Normally Tony was in class fifteen minutes late, at the very latest, and as a result Steve began to worry about him all the more. As soon as he took his seat, Steve felt his phone buzz in his front right jeans pocket. Since he sat at the back of the classroom and the lecture hall was massive Steve was able to look at his phone. When he typed in his password, unlocked his phone and looked through his messages, Steve was surprised to see that Tony texted him.

_Hey. Not that you care or anything but I’m not in class because I had a meeting with my board of directors for Heroes for Hope and I decided to say fuck it to all my classes today. Can you meet up with me sometime today to give me the homework? I emailed Dr. Hill, but she’s a bitch and doesn’t like me so she never responds to my messages. –TS_

_Sure. Where would you like me to drop it off? – SR_

_I’m sitting at the curb by the double doors near Starbucks. It’s nice outside, so why spend it inside? I need to work on my tan anyway; the whole “ghost” look really isn’t in right now.- TS_

_That’s true. I have to go, I think Dr. Hill’s getting suspicious. See you in an hour.- SR_

As soon as Steve texted Tony back and put his phone away, he felt a mixture of anxiety and excitement. While he figured that all Tony wanted was his homework, Steve had an ounce of hope that Tony would want to chat with him. Even if it had nothing to do with the lack of a promise ring and a broken heart, Steve wanted to become friends with Tony at the very least. He just wasn’t sure how.

When class ended and Steve walked outside, Tony was right where he said he’d be. He was smoking a cigarette, and a pack of Newports was sitting next to him. There were only four cigarettes left in it, and when Steve sat down alongside him Tony picked up the pack and offered him one. Steve wasn’t fond of smoking, although he’d tried it once or twice. He didn’t want to make Tony feel worse than he already did by rejecting his offer, so Steve thanked him and took one. Steve put it in his mouth, and Tony politely lit it for him.

As he took a drag from his cigarette, Steve looked over at Tony. He looked exhausted; his eyes were a bit puffy as if he’d been crying, there were bags under his eyes, his skin was a little pale and his face was stuck in a seemingly permanent from. It greatly saddened Steve to see Tony in such a deplorable state, especially since there wasn’t a day in the few months he’d known Tony where he looked so miserable. He had no idea how deep Tony’s love for Bruce ran before, but now Steve could truly see it.

“He dumped me, Steve,” Tony sighed as he dropped his used up cigarette on the cement and ground it into the pavement with his converse shoe.

“Aww Tony… I’m sorry to hear that. You looked so happy… I don’t know what happened but it must’ve been rough…” Steve looked at Tony empathetically before taking another puff of his cigarette.

“Yeah… Hey, I know you said you’d be willing to talk if I needed it… Is that offer still on the table because… Well fuck I hate to admit it but I need to talk about it. My ‘friends’ took Bruce’s side and I really don’t have anyone else. I know you don’t know a goddamn thing about me, so it’s totally fine if you rescind your offer. I’ll be okay either way,” Tony glanced over at Steve before looking out into the parking lot.

“Of course. I don’t take back what I say, especially when someone I know is hurting. Since I know you like to drive, let’s get some coffees to go and I’ll drive us around and we’ll chat. If you end up wanting to stop somewhere to sit, we will. It’s the end of the week, and I don’t have anything going. We can go wherever you want,” Steve responded with a warm smile before putting out his cigarette.

Tony returned the smile, although it weak and still filled with sadness. Steve could tell Tony had put a lot of thought into deciding to open up to him, and no way was Steve going to leave his acquaintance hanging. Hearing that all of Tony’s friends abandoned him broke his heart, and he really hoped that Clint was not one of those people. Knowing his friend, however, he figured that Clint just stayed on the sidelines, listened in on all of their conversations and made a judgment call himself. Clint reminded Steve of a sneaky spy, and sometimes he greatly appreciated Clint’s somewhat shady ways. Steve decided to push Clint’s potential opinion out of his thoughts, however, and instead focused on Tony again.

Steve got up from the curb and helped Tony up off the ground after the brunet put his pack of cigarettes away in his messenger bag. They went back inside, got Tony’s usual black coffee and Steve an earl grey tea before heading back out to the parking lot. Steve decided to drive them around, and he and Tony piled into his 2000 Pontiac Sunfire to drive nowhere in particular.

“This is the kind of car you drive? Steve, I figured you’d have better taste than this! You know if you want I can supe this up for you… Take me a couple hours maybe, but I think this poor little thing’s in need of a boost,” Tony joked, and Steve could tell he was trying to keep the subject off of Bruce.

“Sure, if you’d like to. I know this isn’t the best car but I don’t have the money you do. Now anyway, I know you had some things on your mind besides my car… You can get it all off your chest, I don’t mind,” Steve switched the direction of their conversation, and Tony sighed and took a quick sip of his coffee before he began.

“Well… First I’m going to say this entire situation is bullshit and that I realize there is no way Bruce and I are getting back together. After what he did… I can’t take that shit. And I’ll admit some of this is my fault, not much, but some of it. If you ever hear otherwise they’re wrong. People lied to Bruce about a bunch of shit, and I didn’t do what they said. So there, just going to start you off with that.

“Okay, anyway so Bruce and I have- I mean had- been together for three, going on four years. For the past few months though we haven’t spent a lot of time together, except in the evenings, granted I had time. Bruce is a physics major, and he wants to be a nuclear physicist someday, so he does a lot of research. He’s currently working on his undergraduate dissertation so he’s been busy. I have been too though, because I’m working on mine for my engineering major. I’m currently working on a super computer/butler that can help with basically anything you need. I’m hoping I can use it to organize all of the lists of sick children for my charity and help us find reliable volunteers.

“Not spending a lot of time together’s put some stress on our relationship, and Bruce always tries to act like things don’t bother him and won’t- wouldn’t- tell me when he was upset. It sure as hell bothered me, and I let Bruce know it. I only expressed my frustration because I wanted to show him I gave two shits about him. I’ll admit, Steve… I don’t know if you know this about me but I used to be a playboy. After my parents died I just went on a binge of partying and having sex with anyone who wanted it... I caught chlamydia and gonorrhea, yet it didn’t stop me at all. I was just self-destructive at that time in my life; I didn’t give a fuck about my health or my life at all, and everyone knew it. I actually had an HIV scare… Let me tell you, Steve, that is not something you want on your mind,” Tony took a deep breath and took several gulps of coffee, giving Steve a moment to process the information.

Steve nodded his head as he took in the information. He was well aware of Tony’s past; there was not a single person who didn’t know about his old ways, and if they didn’t they simply weren’t paying attention. While he hadn’t known about Tony catching a venereal disease, Steve didn’t really feel like he could judge him. He sincerely believed that Tony had changed, however, and Steve didn’t believe in the idea of judging a man for the mistakes of his past.

“Where was I… Oh yeah, me and Bruce. Well because I spent so much time in the engineering labs some of our friends began to get suspicious. They thought I was slipping back into my past patterns of behavior and lying to Bruce about where I was, even though they knew damn well that I’m busy with my dissertation. I have to finish it, and I’m on a roll right now; no way can I stop when I’ve got motivation. Well, I was doing great until all this shit happened.

“So some of our friends told Bruce they were worried that I was cheating on him…. And Bruce didn’t say anything, but I knew something was wrong. I had no idea what it was though; I just assumed he was upset because we hadn’t gone out on a date in a while. That wasn’t it though, obviously, and he started to think that I was up to no good too. So one day Bruce came to the lab that I was working in to check and see if I was there. I wasn’t though, and when Bruce looked out in the parking lot my car was gone too.

“Needless to say he thought the worst, and the next day, which was last week when you saw me without my ring, was when shit hit the fan. The night before, I arrived at his apartment pretty late… eleven at night I think? Anyway, Bruce blew up on me. I swear he became a monster; he threw shit at me, was telling me that I ‘betrayed him’ and that he’d had enough of me. I asked him what his problem was, and he told me that he went to visit me at the lab and I wasn’t there, and neither was my car. The only reason I was gone was because I was getting a cheeseburger and some French fries; I didn’t eat all day, and I was getting light-headed. Since it was nine ‘o’ clock at the time the cafeteria was closed so I couldn’t go there. I would’ve invited Bruce to come along, but I thought he was busy working on his physics experiment.

“I kept trying to explain the situation to him, but Bruce wasn’t having any of it; our ‘friends’ got it in his head that I was being unfaithful… I didn’t fucking do anything wrong, Steve. Sure I was gone a lot, didn’t always remember to text him back, and I’d drink a bit too much sometimes, but for fuck’s sake I would never cheat on him. Bruce should’ve known that, but he didn’t trust me anymore. There was nothing I could’ve said to change his mind, and believe me I tried. I love him, and then he just throws me away because of a bullshit rumor.

“At the end of all of it, Bruce grabbed me, ripped the ring off my finger and told me that he wanted to give it to someone special who deserved it. He kicked me out of his place, and told me he never wanted to talk again. It’s not very often that Bruce erupts, even though I know he’s angry pretty much twenty four-seven. But it was so bad, Steve… He was like a giant rage monster. I think he made himself sick worrying about all of this too, because his skin was kind of green. And don’t get me wrong, I don’t want you to ever hate Bruce because of me. He really is a good guy, but he bought into all of those lies… And now I don’t have any friends, no Bruce, nothing…” Tony wiped away tears on his blazer as he sniffled.

After Tony dried his eyes, he opened up his backpack and pulled out his pack of cigarettes. He pulled one out, stuck it in his mouth and dug a lighter out of his left jeans pocket. Tony lit the cigarette, tossed the lighter in his book bag and took a long draw off of the Newport; Steve glanced over in Tony’s direction and could’ve sworn he inhaled half of the cigarette. To keep the smoke from stinking up his car, Steve pushed the “open windows” button on the center console and the windows rolled down, allowing the smoke to leave and for Tony to tap the ashes of his cig down onto the road.

“I promise I don’t normally smoke this much, and I’m sure you have a rule about it because you seem like the kind of guy who hates people doing it in his car and if you do I’m sorry. They just help calm me down, and honestly I’m still a little surprised with myself that I told you all of that. You don’t even know me and you listened to me… Why? It really doesn’t make any sense. I’ve only said hi to you a few times and have made no effort whatsoever to get to know you even though Clint’s friends with both of us, yet you took time to talk to me. What in the fuck for? Shit all of my friends abandoned me, Clint included, and then you just waltz into my life when I’m pissed as fuck and buy me coffee… You know Clint’s actually the one that started this bullshit. I should’ve just kicked his ass and maybe Bruce would still love me,” Tony flicked away the ashes out the window, not taking his eyes away from Steve.

“Tony, the reason I asked is because I’m genuinely concerned about your wellbeing. Just because we aren’t best friends doesn’t mean I can’t give you a shoulder to cry on. You’re a good guy, and I know that. I completely believe you, and I mean it,” Steve stated in a blunt yet kind way, and Tony smiled a sincere smile for the first time in over a week.

“You know what? Fuck all of them. I know I didn’t do anything wrong, and if they’re all going to hate me because Clint did this then whatever. I can do better than Bruce… I don’t know how, but I’ll find someone better. You’re pretty fucking great Steve… Can we stop somewhere and get more coffee? Mine’s cold and gross now and I pretty much need it to live. There’s more coffee in me than blood I think,” Tony joked, to which Steve chuckled and rolled his eyes.

Steve agreed, and as they drove around they found a nice little coffee shop in a small town an hour away from Shield University. They sat down and enjoyed their time together, the tone moving from somber to enthusiastic. It was as if Tony’s cares had been taken away just by having Steve there, and it meant the world to him that someone actually took the time to listen to him. Even though Clint was one of Steve’s best friends, he didn’t for a second believe that Tony was capable of cheating on Bruce. When they were together they looked so in love, and he couldn’t imagine Tony giving that up for some cheap fling.

For once in his life, Tony felt like someone had really listened to him because they truly cared. It wasn’t about his money, his charity, his family history, or his research; rather it was because of genuine worry. Bruce didn’t even make him feel that way in all of the years they were together, though he was always sincere and did love him. Something was just different about Steve, and in that hour he knew that he had a genuine, loving friend who would be there for him through thick and thin. It made him feel warmer than the piping hot coffee they drank at the small café, and Tony almost forgot why he felt so down in the dumps.


	2. Chapter 2

Tony and Steve always had coffee at Starbucks after their geography class twice a week soon after they became friends. They would do their homework, chat and simply enjoy each other’s company. At the beginning, Tony talked about his relationship with Bruce often, getting all of his pent up feelings out on the table. Steve listened empathetically, and told him his experience with Thor, the first guy he’d ever loved. When Tony found out that Steve could actually relate, it put his mind at ease and made him realize that it was okay to be hurt and upset by what had happened. At the beginning of the next semester four months later, Tony was finally able to push the thoughts of Bruce out of his mind, and they were able to talk about deeper subjects. On Valentine’s Day, however, everything came flooding back in the worst way imaginable.

“God I’m so glad that exam’s over with… Can you believe Coulson? He’s such a bastard, Steve. Seriously, who in the hell makes you draw and name every single weapon made during the Civil War? Good thing I have a photographic memory, but still. How much you want to bet every single person except me, and maybe you, failed that. Actually I don’t need to bet that, because I know it…” Tony continued to ramble as he outstretched his hands to take his coffee mug from Steve.

He was used to Tony ranting and raving about something or another, and Steve allowed him to do so. It never bothered him to listen, and at times when it wasn’t anything important, such as a History 230 exam, Steve didn’t always catch everything Tony said but when it actually mattered Steve gave him his full attention. Steve didn’t want to admit it to himself, but he loved Tony immensely, and all he wanted was to be with him. He never knew how to approach the subject however, and Steve wanted to give Tony more than enough time to heal after his painful breakup. It was starting to eat away at him the more he saw Tony, however, and he had no idea how much longer he could keep his feelings to himself. Since it was Valentine’s Day, Steve decided to give Tony a little gift. It wasn’t much, but it was what Steve planned on using to show just how much he cared about Tony’s life.  It was at his apartment, neatly wrapped up and sitting on his bed, waiting for Tony to come and open it.

“Tony… I was wondering if you had some time to come over toni-” Steve began to say, but they were interrupted when Tony saw two people come in through the double doors.

Steve watched the look on Tony’s face; it looked as if Tony’s heart shattered all over again, and he could clearly see the rage bubble up inside of him. He gently placed his hand on Tony’s in an attempt to calm him, but it didn’t work; Tony was up on his feet before Steve could even grab him.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing! So this is why you fucking lied to Bruce and broke us up, so you could fuck him! Our whole friendship was a lie, you sonofabitch! And you seriously gave him the ring you bought me… What in the fuck is wrong with you!” Tony yelled as he rushed at Clint and tackled him to the ground.

Steve got up and hurried over to them, but the situation was already in full swing. Even though Tony was completely fired up and furious, Clint was calm and stronger. He flipped Tony over, got on top of him and grabbed him by the throat. Tony managed to deck him square in the nose even though he couldn’t breathe, and blood began to gush out of Clint’s nose. Blood was pouring into Tony’s face; in his open mouth, on his nose, and some managed to get into his eyes. When the red fluid dripped into Tony’s eyes, he unconsciously closed them to flush out the intrusion.

In a literal blink of an eye, Clint grabbed Tony’s hands with one of his, put them over his head and punched Tony directly in his left eye. It immediately began to swell, and Tony tried to squirm away from Clint. He couldn’t, however, and as he continued to struggle Clint punched him in the mouth. His lower lip split open, and his blood mixed in with Clint’s. Blood seeped into Tony’s mouth and he began to cough, spraying Clint with little droplets of both of their fluids. As he coughed, he smiled up at Clint, called him a pussy, and brought out his ex-friend’s rage. He let go of Tony’s hands and placed them both on his throat, shaking him so hard that Tony’s head hit the ground repeatedly.

All of this happened in less than a minute; the altercation was so heated that Clint was able to do some horrific damage in just a short period of time. Steve was just as upset as both of them, and when Clint briefly took his hands away from Tony’s neck Steve grabbed him. He picked Clint up by his collar, slammed him against the wall to their right and stared directly into his ex-friend’s eyes; Steve’s eyes were filled with a fire Clint had never seen before, and he instantly felt guilty that he’d indirectly hurt a friend he actually cared about.

“Look, you already took Bruce away from Tony! He has every right to be pissed at you and you think you can just beat the blood out of him. Clint, I thought you were better than this but apparently I was wrong. You’re a sneaky piece of shit, and our friendship is done… And Bruce?” Steve let go of Clint and gently helped a bloody, semi-conscious Tony up.

“You really missed out on someone good. Thanks for breaking up with him, because he deserves so much better than you. And one day, you’ll wake up next to Clint and wish it was Tony laying there next to you. Think about that,” Steve put Tony’s arm around his shoulders and the two walked out of the building, leaving Bruce watching them, completely dumbfounded and Clint bleeding.

Steve was worried that Tony had a concussion, so he quickly took him to the hospital, ignoring the fact that Tony was getting blood on his seats. He didn’t care; all that mattered to him was Tony’s safety. Tony kept insisting that he was okay as he wiped his blood away from his mouth, but Steve told him to stay calm. Of course Tony would never stop talking, but Steve was relieved that for once Tony couldn’t shut up. It told him that he was functioning and conscious and he knew that if Tony stopped that there would be real problems on their hands.

When they arrived at the hospital, the staff immediately recognized Tony and took him to an emergency room suite. It was clearly reserved for people they deemed to be important, and of course Tony was one of them. While it was still bright white, sterile and reeked of bleach, it beat having to share a room with another patient. The two male nurses made Steve stay outside of the room and he watched as they helped Tony into the room. They were handsome, and Steve could tell that the most attractive nurses were only used in cases of people like Tony being brought in. They quickly set to work, washing his face clean of blood and taking in the damage.

Steve waited in the lobby for an hour for Tony, and he was worried that he’d pass out from the blood loss or from a potential concussion. Even though Steve knew he had ultimately not lost much blood, the thought of Tony needing to stay in a hospital terrified him. He loved Tony with all of his heart, and the last thing he wanted was for him to hurt so much. Steve realized after that outburst, however, that Tony was by no means ready for a relationship and that it was a terrible time to express his feelings. All he could do was continue to be Tony’s best friend and enjoy their coffee “dates” together. When Tony finally came out, he had a big bandage that spanned from the bridge of his nose down to his nostrils on his face, and he was holding a bag of ice to his eye with his right hand and a bottle of painkillers in the other. The bruising and swelling was getting worse, but luckily Tony didn’t have any broken or cracked teeth.

Without saying anything to Steve, Tony rushed right past him and out of the hospital doors. Steve put down his magazine, got up and slowly followed him outside, only to find him already sitting inside of his Sunfire. Tony was crying, and Steve was unsure what to do or say; sure, he’d seen Tony shaken up, but never had he had a breakdown like this in front of him. He was sobbing so loud that it could be heard from outside of the car, and to spare him any embarrassment Steve thought it would be best for them to drive off. Steve carefully opened his car door, got in, put on his seatbelt and drove out of the parking lot, hoping that leaving the hospital would settle some of Tony’s nerves.

As Steve drove, he couldn’t help but glance over at Tony every few seconds. Tony couldn’t stop crying; it was as if a dam broke, and Steve knew it was long overdue. Even though Steve talked to him often about the stress in his life, Tony always approached it in either a humorous or aggressive fashion. In the entire four months that they spent talking and enjoying one another’s company, not once did Tony allow himself to completely let go this way. He knew Tony never wanted to feel vulnerable, but Steve knew that one day he would crack. A relationship of over three years falling apart was not something a person could readily get over, and Steve understood that; even a yearlong relationship ending was heart wrenching enough. Tony was going to find out about Bruce and Clint sooner or later, however, and Steve started to regret his error.

Unlike Tony, Steve knew that Bruce and Clint were in a relationship, but he never told him about it. Clint spent quite a bit of time with Steve before the incident that had just transpired, and sometimes he’d bring Bruce along. At first he didn’t know they were together, as Tony had mentioned that Bruce and Clint were good friends. That wasn’t the case, however, and even though it wasn’t explicitly mentioned Steve had a gut feeling that something was up. Not even a month after Tony spilled his guts to Steve, his two friends came over for a visit. They were all hanging out in the living room, and when Steve left the room for several minutes and came back in Clint and Bruce were all over each other. They assumed Steve went off to take a shower, and in horror Steve caught a glimpse of what looked like the two French-kissing. He quickly went to the bathroom and took a shower, and debated for a long time whether or not he should tell Tony about it.

Steve kept his lips sealed on the matter, however, and since Tony avoided all of the places that Bruce and Clint would be he never saw them together. He thought that by the time his ex-friend and ex-boyfriend came around together that Tony would be over it and be his happy, sassy self again. While he was doing much better and even loved to go out and do things with Steve, Tony was in no way, shape, or form completely over his intense love for Bruce. When he saw the strings keeping Tony’s heart together rip away the moment Bruce and Clint walked hand in hand through those double doors Steve realized maybe he should’ve told his friend sooner.

As Tony continued to cry, Steve decided to drive to his apartment. He wasn’t sure if it was the best idea, but Steve couldn’t stand the thought of Tony being all alone. Steve had a bed he could sleep in if he needed it, some ice cream, and plenty of movies they could watch if Tony felt up to it. He knew he wouldn’t want to be alone in a time like this, and Steve could only offer his friendship and a safe place to weep. Luckily he only lived about ten minutes away from the hospital, so they wouldn’t be stuck in Steve’s now blood-stained car any longer.

He pulled into the dumpy parking lot of his apartment complex, parked in a diagonal parking space and turned off the car. Without saying a word, Steve got out, opened up Tony’s side of the car, unbuckled his seatbelt for him and helped him out of the Sunfire. Tony buried his face in his hands out of embarrassment for his pitiful state, so Steve put his arm around Tony and led him to his apartment several feet away. He lived in one of the apartments on the first level, so Steve thankfully didn’t have to help him up any stairs. Steve quickly unlocked the door, opened it and brought Tony inside so no one would see him. He knew how much pride Tony had, and he didn’t want anyone that went to school with them to see. Steve carefully led Tony over to the couch, had him sit down and then joined him.

“Tony, you have every right to be upset. What Bruce and Clint did is unacceptable, and it’s a damn shame that Bruce let you go. I know you may not believe me right now, but you can get so much better than him. You’ll find someone worth your time someday, anyone would be lucky to have you, Tony. I want you to believe that. You deserve someone who trusts you,” Steve spoke softly as he rubbed Tony’s back gently to calm him.

“Steve, you don’t even understand… Get me a tissue; I’m done with this pathetic crying bullshit. This isn’t getting me anywhere,” Tony began to pull his hands away from his face, but they were covered in tears and a long trail of snot connected to his nose.

He nodded in response and quickly grabbed a tissue, along with some hand sanitizer, from the end table on his left. Steve held both objects out to Tony, and he took them with a mumbled “thank you.” After he dried his eyes, carefully wiped his nose and sanitized his hands, he looked up at Steve. He had that same kind, yet difficult to read, smile on his face, and Tony wondered if he would ever truly understand why Steve took so much time to listen to him and care about him. Tony did care a lot about Steve in return and was thankful for their friendship, but in the back of his mind he was always trying to figure out whether or not Steve wanted something from him.

“Look, I get it. You think you can relate to me because of your relationship with Thor, but you can’t. For one, you were only with him for one year. Two, you didn’t promise to spend your lives together and make useful contributions to the scientific community hand in hand. Which leads me to point three; you didn’t have your supposed ‘best friend’ spread lies to snag your boyfriend up from under you, and you didn’t lose all your friends. So tell me, how can you possibly understand? And why the fuck do you care, anyway? None of this has anything to do with you…

“Oh, and another thing. I was handling myself just fine until you ruined it all. Sure I’m a bit banged up, but I could’ve had him! I didn’t need to go to the hospital, Steve. None of this is life threatening! Though they did take some of my blood to check for bloodborne pathogens…  You know it’s pretty disgusting that Clint’s blood was in my mouth, my nose, and my eyes. I can still taste it,” Tony smacked his lips and he began to grimace in disgust.  

“You know Tony, I know you’re upset. You’re hurt because Bruce dumped you for Clint, and you have every right to be upset. If you weren’t I’d be concerned. But taking it out on me isn’t going to do either of us any good. You’re welcome at my apartment any time, and if you’d like to hang out here for a few days you can. I don’t want you to be by yourself right now,” Steve got up from the couch, picked up a clean blanket that was neatly folded in a laundry basket and tossed it to Tony.

“Sorry, Steve. I know you’re trying to help me, but it just fucking kills… Having my lip ripped open from the ring that was meant for me, but now it’s on Clint’s hand… I was doing so well! And I just get upset about this stupid shit that doesn’t even matter. Shit, I knew they were together and I-”

“Wait, you knew about Bruce and Clint?” Steve interjected, feeling a bit relieved that he hadn’t actually been keeping a secret.

“Yeah, of course I did. Everyone knew. They thought they were being ‘secretive’ I’m sure, but someone would actually leave me things here and there to tell me they were  a thing. Found a used condom in my backpack once and I knew it was Bruce’s dried up jizz in it, a sex tape of the two ‘mysteriously’ ended up on my doorstep… Could’ve been someone else, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was Clint. He’s a sneaky little prick. It could’ve been Natasha too though, because she dislikes Clint for breaking up with her and she _really_ hates me a lot, and believe me the feelings are mutual… But that doesn’t matter. The point is I knew and that was a big reason why I was doing so much better. You helped more, but knowing there was no chance I could have Bruce back was doing some good. I guess it’s just the fact that it’s Valentine’s Day and I saw my old promise ring on someone else. At least I’m technically not alone today though,” Tony sighed, then looked at Steve with a weak smile.

“Well I’m glad I can be your ‘technically not alone’ for Valentine’s Day friend, Tony. I actually got you something. Be right back,” Steve replied with a grin before leaving to get the gift.

Tony didn’t say anything in return; he had no idea what to think about the fact that Steve bought him a present. It was awfully nice of him, and this was the first time in years that he was actually getting a physical gift that wasn’t someone’s naked body for the holiday. He had absolutely no idea what it could be, but in the back of Tony’s mind he wanted the surprise to be a very exposed Steve; maybe a handjob or a blowjob could cheer him up. But at that thought he felt a small pang of guilt; he didn’t want to think of Steve as little more than a sexual object. After all, they were best friends first and foremost. From time to time, however, he couldn’t help but imagine dating Steve and having his way with him. It was just a harmless thought, after all, though Tony swiftly pushed it out of his mind when Steve came in bearing a small gift wrapped up in deep red wrapping paper.

Steve sat down on the couch next to Tony and put the small wrapped gift in his friend’s hands. He looked at Tony and nodded for him to open it. With trembling fingers, Tony quickly made short work of the paper and opened the cardboard box it was in. Inside sat several neatly stacked pieces of paper. He quickly pulled them out of the box, read them over and a huge look of shock formed on his face; never had one of his best friends expressed any interest in being involved in this aspect of his life. Without thinking, Tony reached over and hugged Steve close to his body, unsure of how else to express his gratitude.

“…Are you sure, Steve? It’s a huge time commitment and you’re not getting paid… Really, you don’t have to do this. Even though you signed the paperwork it’s okay to duck out now. You may have to miss classes, go to other parts of the country if a certain little guy or girl wants you to come see them… And we have to design your costume still along wi-” Steve slowly pulled away from the embrace and shushed Tony.

“I want to do this. These children are important to you, and they’re important to me too. You’re my best friend, Tony, and I want to be more involved. The least I can do is don a superhero costume and spend time with kids who need it. Also, I designed my own costume already, but I don’t have a name. The design’s on the back sheet of paper,” Steve added, to which Tony flipped through the pages and looked at it.

Tony began to laugh softly as he looked at it; the two friends had joked back and forth about this kind of costume for the past two months. They always wondered what it would look like if Professor Coulson designed a superhero outfit, and Steve executed it beautifully. Their teacher was passionately in love with America, and often they suspected that if he could he’d make love to an American flag. He was always wearing something patriotic; a pin, a tie, cufflinks…  Anything to show his love for the grand ol’ U.S of A. Steve’s costume design hit the nail on the head: red gloves and boots, a white star on the chest, white and red stripes on the torso, blue on the arms, chests, legs, and helmet, and a large white “A” on the front of the helmet.

“Captain America. Your superhero name’s Captain America. This is perfect, Steve. You’re going to be so popular with the kids you may have to drop out of Shield University, just to give you a fair warning,” Tony mumbled softly, still staring in awe at the beautiful designs drawn by Steve’s hands.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Tony. I hope the kids like me as much as you think they will,” Steve answered appreciatively, and when Tony looked up at him the feeling in the room completely changed.

The air felt thick with something… Lust? Affection? Perhaps love? Steve didn’t know, but he didn’t want to risk taking advantage of Tony in this vulnerable state. He loved Tony more than he loved Thor all those years ago, and he never wanted to ruin the friendship they had. So instead of making a move, Steve got up, went to the kitchen and scooped out some Neapolitan ice cream in two bowls for both of them to eat. Even though it wasn’t exactly what Steve wanted, he got the point across to Tony that he was loyal, sincerely cared about his charity and would be there for him regardless of their relationship status.

He brought the ice cream over to Tony, and with a friendly “thank you” his best friend took it from his hands. Steve flipped on Tony’s favorite movie, “Idiocracy,” and they spent the rest of the night laughing and talking. Knowing that he was able to help take Tony’s mind off of the pain gave Steve a confidence boost and made him realize just how important he was to Tony, even if the genius never explicitly stated it. He hoped that someday he could tell Tony just how much he cared about him, but for now this was enough for Steve, and he was happy. And it appeared that Tony was too.


	3. Chapter 3

After that weekend, Steve and Tony became closer than ever. They were spending the majority of their free time together, most of it regarding making Steve’s suit and training him to be around the kids, however. Nevertheless the two loved being around each other, and it seemed as though Tony was hardly thinking about Bruce at all. He never came up in conversation anymore; rather Tony talked about the charity, video games, his electronic butler he was working on, or coffee. Since the drag race was coming up on the first week of April, less than a month away, Tony focused most of his energy on it. Steve wasn’t of much help; he had no experience planning the Heroes for Hope drag competition, he wasn’t going to compete, and he still had to complete his two months’ worth of training.

Much to Steve’s delight, however, Tony was basically living with him at his low-end apartment. Even though Tony was used to living in a huge, lavish mansion, the genius was tired of living all alone and took advantage of Steve’s offer to let him stay there whenever he wanted. He stayed so often that Steve eventually asked Tony to bring over some clothes and toiletries to permanently leave with him at the apartment. He slept on the couch every time, even though Steve offered to trade sleeping arrangements with him every other night. It just brought Steve peace at night to know that Tony was with him, safe and sound, and not all alone growing mad from loneliness in his parents’ mansion.

Even when scheduling was a pain in their day to day life, Steve and Tony always went to Starbucks after Coulson’s history lecture. The time together may have just been long enough to stand in line, get coffee/tea and part ways or sometimes they’d get lucky enough to have an hour or more to kill. Any time was enough for Steve, and he appreciated every moment he had with his best friend. Tony also felt the same, but it was unspoken between them. They just _knew_.

“God… One week and the race’ll be on its fourth year. Shit, it’s unbelievable for me to think sometimes that I’ve had the charity for four years now. I can’t believe it’s taken off like this… But I guess when you make a charity that helps terminally ill children people are more likely to sponsor you. After all, if you don’t want to help kids something’s seriously wrong with you. At least by American standards,” Tony stated nonchalantly before taking a swig of a Trenti black coffee.

“I’m glad you’ve stuck with this, Tony. It’s such a great idea, and I know I’m looking forward to being a part of it. I’ve been selling shirts with some of the other art club students, and we’ve been doing pretty well so far. I think this year will be the biggest fundraiser yet… I wish I could do more, but at least on April 14th I’ll be trained so I can be ‘stationed’ wherever I’m needed,” Steve responded with a smile, saluting Tony.

“Yes, of course soldier. You’ll be more than ready. Your first assignment will be after the semester ends the last week of April. After your training, we’ll take pictures of you and my writing staff will make up a bio for you. I think you’re going to b- Hold on a sec, I’m getting a text,” Tony halted mid-sentence before checking his phone.

Steve watched the smile on Tony’s face leave in a split second; he knew whatever the text message said wasn’t good from Tony’s facial expression. He was worried that something went wrong in the drag race planning, or there was an emergency with one of the children on the Heroes for Hope list. He couldn’t help but stare intensely at Tony, and after what seemed like hours Tony met his gaze.

“Here, read this…” Tony sighed before handing Steve his smartphone.

_Hey, Tony. I know it’s been a while since we’ve talked. Would you be willing to come over to my apartment soon? I’d like to talk to you about something. Hope you’re well.-BB_

“Steve, I really need to go see him. I don’t know what he wants, but it’ll eat me up inside if I tell him no… I’m going to write him back real quick, and I want you to tell me if it sounds like a good message,” Tony added and swiftly took the phone from Steve’s hands.

Tony typed up a message in a flash, and he showed the text to Steve to make sure it was appropriate. He didn’t want to sound upset, desperate, or overtly enthusiastic, and he knew his best friend would be honest with him. He had no idea what Bruce could possibly want, but he still wanted to make a good impression on his ex-boyfriend.

_Sure. I’m done with class so I’ll be over in a half an hour. See you then.- TS_

“I think that works, Tony. It sounds objective and it can’t be taken the wrong way. At least to me, anyway. Do you what you need to do; I know whatever happens you’ll make the right choice. I’ll be at the apartment, good luck,” Steve replied in a calm, sincere voice.

Tony nodded his head “okay” in response, and the two got up and walked out to the parking lot. They didn’t say anything else to each other; Tony was lost in thought, and Steve noticed his best friend was sweating a little. He was nervous about what Bruce wanted to talk about, and it was painfully obvious. Even though Steve didn’t want Tony to see Bruce at all after what happened on Valentine’s Day, it wasn’t his place to stop him. If this was what Tony needed and it would bring him some peace, then Steve couldn’t knock him for it. On the way back to his apartment, he prayed that no matter what, Tony would come back and tell him all about it.

At eight ‘o’ clock at night, Tony knocked on the door, and Steve put down his sketchbook and opened the door. Much to his delight, Tony had a smile on his face and he looked calm and collected. It appeared that nothing bad had happened, which greatly relieved Steve. On the other hand, however, he felt a wave of panic overtake him; there was a possibility that the two got back together, which was the last thing Steve wanted to happen. He quickly pushed that thought of his head and allowed Tony to come back to the place that essentially became his home. Tony took off his shoes, walked over to the couch and jumped onto it, landing comfortably on his back.

“Can I have a recap of what happened tonight, Tony? You look happier than I’ve seen you in a while,” Steve asked after several seconds of long, awkward silence.

“I’d be more than happy to, Steve. So after I drove over to Bruce’s place this is what went down…”

***

“Come in, Tony. I have a mug of coffee sitting for you on the kitchen table. Take a seat,” Bruce welcomed Tony in with a nervous smile.

“What am I on, Dateline’s ‘To Catch a Predator?’” he joked, though Bruce didn’t even so much as chuckle.

When Tony sat down at the chair at the end of the table on the left, Bruce took the seat directly to the right of it. They were sitting close together, and Tony shifted in his seat anxiously. He had no clue what to expect, though he could read from Bruce’s body language that it was important. Tony’s heart was beating furiously in his chest, and he knew he was a little shaky when he picked up his coffee and took a drink.

He thought nothing could possibly calm him in this moment, but all of a sudden the scent of Bruce’s tea flooded his nostrils. It was earl grey, one of Steve’s favorite types of tea. His best friend had a whole cupboard filled with various types of tea, and while Tony normally didn’t care much for the smell it reminded him of Steve. Just knowing that after this moment, no matter what happened between him and Bruce, he could go to Steve’s apartment eased his mind. Unlike before, Tony actually had a friend who was on his side, cared about him, and wanted to be involved in his life. Even though Steve never talked much about his problems, Tony always made an effort to ask Steve how he was doing and listen if he needed it. Their friendship was by far the most rewarding he’d ever had, and with that realization Tony cared much less about the potential outcome of this visit than he had just moments before.

 “Well… I guess I should start talking. I don’t want to take up too much of your time. So… I really miss you a lot, Tony.  I miss spending time with you, talking about our dissertations, going out on dates, watching movies… It just doesn’t feel right not having you in my life,” Bruce spoke softly, opting to look down at his cup of tea instead of Tony’s face.

“What do you want, Bruce? Because you sure as hell didn’t just invite me here to tell me you miss me,” Tony’s tone of voice was a bit harsher than he intended, and Bruce finally looked at him before responding.

“I’ve thought about the answer to that question for a long time, Tony, and I honestly don’t know. I still love you, but I love Clint too.  I want you to be a part of my life again; that’s all I know for sure… What do you want?” Bruce responded with some hesitation.

“Why are you asking me what _I_ want? Look, I came here and you were supposed to have a definitive statement, an answer… Something anyway. But you really want to know what I want?” Tony asked, to which Bruce sheepishly shook his head “yes.”

“I want you to make up your mind. Before I leave here, I want you to make a decision and explain your reason. Then I’ll tell you what I want. You called me here, the first move is yours. Go take a shower and think about it, since I know that’s where you come up with your best ideas, and I’ll be sitting on the couch waiting for you. I promise I won’t leave. Now hurry up; Steve’s waiting for me to come over,” Tony stated boldly and clearly, to which Bruce slowly walked out of the kitchen to the bathroom.

Tony sat down on the couch in the living room as he waited for Bruce to make up his mind. He knew he didn’t know what he wanted either; he thought about the good times and the bad time’s they’d had, and wondered if things could ever go back to the way they were. That is if Bruce decided he wanted to be in a relationship with him again. But as he looked around the room and saw all of their pictures together were replaced by ones of Bruce with Clint, he realized that his ex-boyfriend had moved on, at least to some extent. Tony knew he’d never be able to forgive Bruce for giving Clint his promise ring, and if they ever slept together he’d be jealous that Clint had been with him. Being in a relationship with Bruce wouldn’t be satisfying the way it was several months ago, and Tony knew it wasn’t worth it. He couldn’t even remember the last time Bruce made him happy, and with more introspection Tony came to the conclusion that the time they’d been broken up had been some of the happiest days of his life. Even though he’d been in a lot of pain, he had Steve, and Steve made him happier than any romantic relationship ever had.

When Bruce came out of the bathroom, squeaky clean and with a towel wrapped around his waist, Tony’s logical, rational thoughts fluttered out of his head. Images of the passionate, intimate sex he’d had with Bruce flooded his brain, and Tony could feel himself getting excited. He didn’t want to feel this way, but he couldn’t help it. It’d been so long since anyone had touched him that his mind often wandered to that realm, even at the most inopportune times. As soon as Bruce began to speak, however, Tony snapped back into reality and focused on the words, not the hairy, thin body in front of him.

“I don’t want you back as a boyfriend, Tony, but as a _friend_. I love you, but in a platonic way now. I tried to imagine us sleeping together while I was in the shower, but I couldn’t picture it. All I could think about was Clint. I tried to imagine walking down the aisle to you, but again, I could only see Clint waiting there for me, not you. I don’t see a future with you as anything more than a good friend,” Bruce’s voice trailed off as he avoided eye contact with Tony yet again.

“Well, I’m glad you feel the same way, Bruce, because I couldn’t imagine having to spend my life with you. If you were so quick to believe I was cheating on you and date another guy after me, how could I trust _you_ to be around for _me_. You gave him the ring you bought me, after all! Couldn’t you have just sold that one and bought Clint another one? You know something, the more I think about it the less I even want to be in your life. You couldn’t respect me enough to believe me, you hooked up with the piece of shit who spread rumors about me cheating, and you didn’t give me one damn chance to explain… Fuck this; I’m not even going to give you another minute of my time. Steve was right; it was for the best you broke up with me because I do deserve better than you,” Tony huffed before getting up from the couch and brushing past Bruce.

As Tony made his way over to the door, it began to open. Tony’s heart crawled up into his throat at the sudden motion, but he continued towards the door anyway. If he stopped, the situation might look worse than it already did. The door swung open in a flash, and immediately Clint stepped into the well-lit apartment. He blocked Tony’s way out of the apartment and glared at him, though a smirk was plastered on his face. The look was soon replaced with a frown, however, when Clint saw Bruce’s nearly naked body on display.

“Who’s going to tell me what’s going on here? Tony, you’re red in the face; Bruce, you’re wearing nothing but a towel…” Clint carefully closed the door behind him, standing up against the door to continue blocking the only exit.

“Your boyfriend texted me because he had a question about an equation he was working on in his dissertation. It didn’t seem right to him so he wanted me to take a second look. And he was in the shower, Clint. You know he takes them so he can think… At least I hope you do. Bruce figured it out and rushed out of the shower to tell me, which is why he’s not properly dressed. Instead of wondering about what Bruce is doing ‘behind your back,’ you should trust that he would never cheat on you. Now get out of the way, Clint. I have better things to do than explain myself,” without skipping a beat, Tony pushed Clint out of the way and stepped out the door.

***

“I’m glad you stood up for yourself… But why did you lie?” Steve asked as he sat on the right arm of the couch and fiddled with his smartphone.

“Well, the seeds of doubt were planted right when Clint came in, but no matter what I say it won’t make a difference. But I thought this would be a bit better damage control than actually telling Clint that Bruce missed me. I may hate him, but I don’t want to ruin his relationship with Bruce. They do really love each other, and I could tell from all the pictures they had together. Clint wasn’t a rebound to Bruce at all, and to be honest I’m sure Bruce had feelings for that asshole for a long time. They spend more time together than Bruce and I ever had when we were dating,” Tony shrugged his shoulders in indifference.

“Well that’s understandable, and it was probably for the best that you lied. Enough about them though, I have one thing I need to ask you:  are you happy with the outcome? That’s all that matters to me,” Steve questioned, making eye contact with Tony and waiting patiently for a response.

“…Yeah. Yeah, I am. Thanks for being my best friend, Steve. When I was there, at first I thought about how much I missed him, but then I realized that spending time with you has been better than most of the ones I had with Bruce. I don’t know how I’d be doing if you weren’t here,” Tony answered with a warm smile, which Steve returned.

“Thanks, Tony. You’re my best friend too and I’ll always be here. I think this is cause for celebration. Let’s get some pizza, my treat. A large cheeseburger pizza, right?” Steve dialed their favorite pizza restaurant, and Tony responded with “you know be better than anyone, Steve.”

Steve wanted more than anything to kiss Tony in that moment and reveal his feelings, but he knew it wasn’t the right time. He was proud of Tony for telling Bruce how he felt, and he couldn’t be more relieved that Tony didn’t go back, although he wasn’t granted the opportunity. Even if Tony’s heart never belonged to Steve, he knew that Tony deserved better than the emotional stress that came with Bruce and Clint. To him, showing Tony that he would always be there and was proud of his accomplishments was a step in the right direction. That strange feeling in the air that Steve felt on Valentine’s Day came back, but he knew he couldn’t act on them. He hoped one day there would be a perfect moment or divine intervention, but until then he was happy sitting next to Tony on the couch, watching horror movies and eating hot, cheesy pizza.


	4. Chapter 4

The charity event was a roaring success for the fourth year in a row. The drag race made far more money than Tony could’ve imagined, though not for a reason he wanted. The gambling club, led by Wade Wilson, decided to place a little wager on the year’s race, though the bets would go to Heroes for Hope and those who bet correctly would get a free burrito voucher from Barry’s Burritos, one of the race’s six-figure sponsors. Everyone in the entire university found out about the dispute between Tony and Clint back on Valentine’s Day, and while not everyone knew the reasoning behind it everyone was well aware that Clint planned on competing that year.

Wade couldn’t help but get involved in all the hubbub, so the week before the race he put up signs all across campus urging people to place bets. Tony and Clint’s faces were plastered all over them, along with the promise of free burritos to those who placed the correct bet. It cost three dollars to place a wager, though more could be given. After Tony lost the fist fight with Clint, many people believed that the Heroes for Hope founder no longer had his scrappy, fighting spirit. Much to Wade’s surprise, over half of Shield University’s faculty, staff, and student body bet on Clint to win.

Luckily for Barry’s Burritos, Tony won, just as he had the previous three years. The race wasn’t even close; Tony smoked the competition. No one had a handle on engineering the way Tony did, and now that JARVIS, his electronic butler, was complete, he felt far surer of himself than he had in ages. While he’d contemplated putting his new tech into his car, he decided against it, as he thought it’d cheapen his charity event. Now that he had Steve as a friend, winning didn’t even actually matter to him all that much anymore. While winning the competition certainly made him feel good about himself, Tony was now more concerned with how much money the race raised than on the medal he won.

After Tony won the race, he accepted his medal proudly and gave a shout-out to everyone who made this possible. The children he raised the money for, the volunteers, Wade for raising such an impressive sum of money… And someone else.

“…And while all of you have made Heroes for Hope possible, I have one more person to thank. This year’s event wouldn’t have happened this year without the support of my best friend, Steven Rogers. He’s also one of our newest volunteers! He’ll be making appearance on the new wave of billboards all across the country at the end of this week. Thank you everyone!” Tony yelled into the mike as he held his first place medal in hand, and immediately he was met with roaring applause.

Steve nearly dropped his hot dog and pop when he heard Tony speak his name. While he knew Tony appreciated him, it was on a whole other plane of incredible that his friend actually thanked him in front of thousands. While Steve knew he’d made a difference in Tony’s life, he didn’t realize he’d had such a positive impact, but he was glad he did. After all the things Tony had been through he was finally healing, and it warmed Steve’s heart to see all of the progress that had been made. As the words sunk in, however, Steve thought about the last statement Tony made. His training wasn’t even finished yet, and he was going to be the mascot on the newest wave of billboards? For once, Steve felt impatient, and all he wanted was for the ceremony to be over so they could discuss this in person.  Tony was too busy talking to news anchors, his sponsors, and potential partners this time around, so Steve went to his apartment to await his friend’s return.

“Sorry it took me so long to get home, I seriously had about one hundred people come up to me after the race and ask for my contact information…  Wade even wanted to help. Said he wanted to rotate between being a hero and a villain and call himself ‘Deadpool.’ Hopefully all of them, Wade included, though I don’t know exactly how well he’ll do, will decide to be volunte- Hey!” Steve caught Tony off guard, put him in a headlock and gave him an affectionate noogie.

“Yeah, yeah, Mr. Popular over here…  Thanks for mentioning me today, Tony. That really meant a lot to me. But I have a question,” Steve said with a warm smile as he released Tony from his grip.

“Anytime. My best friend deserves a little credit every once in a while. And if it has to be in front of thousands, so be it. What’s up, Steve?” Tony asked before taking off his shoes and sitting down on the couch.

“You said my face is going to be on billboards at the end of this week to the crowd. But I haven’t been fitted for my costume yet… Not to mention my training isn’t finished until the fourteenth… What’s going on?” Steve questioned as he took a seat next to his best friend, leaning in a little closer than necessary, though Tony countered Steve’s movements.

“Well, I talked it over with my Heroes for Hope ‘cabinet’ of sorts, and I asked about how your training was going. You were far better than any of our other volunteers, and to be honest you probably were ready the moment you signed those papers. But of course I couldn’t just shirk you of that, but we decided that you didn’t need to complete the entire two months. Your suit’s finished and ready for you to wear, and I have your first assignment, if you’d like to see it. JARVIS, pull up the list of Captain America and his assignments,” Tony commanded in a serious, but kind, tone of voice as he pulled out his smartphone.

JARVIS replied with “yes sir,” and in an instant Tony had the list. There was only one child on it currently, and all of the information was pulled up on the screen. He handed it to Steve, who skimmed through it before reading it aloud. Her name was Emily Anderson, and she was a cute little African American girl with braided jet black hair. Steve couldn’t help but show his enthusiasm about his new role, but as he read the child’s biography his heart sank.

“Emily Anderson is a seven year old girl admitted into the University of New Mexico’s Children’s Hospital in Albuquerque. She was diagnosed with childhood leukemia at the age of four years old, and was in remission from the ages of five to six. Her leukemia came out of remission at the age of six and a half, and it is believed that she will pass away before her eighth birthday on April 26th.

“Emily’s favorite subject is American history, and she loves the colors red, white, and blue. Her favorite book is _Let’s Call it America! Meet Our Founding Fathers_ , and she loves to read to her friends and family. Emily also loves writing poetry, and her dream is to be published in a book of poems… She sounds like a sweet little girl. Are you sure I’m ready for this, Tony? What if I make a mistake?” Steve asked after he read her biography.

“She’s going to love you, Steve. After all, you _are_ Captain America, and I know that even though you make fun of Professor Coulson all the time you love American History. Now I need you to pack your bags, you’ll be leaving first thing tomorrow morning. I know I sprung this on you early and I’m sorry, but we don’t have a lot of time with this child and I don’t want to risk her passing away before anyone sees her. None of the other heroes fit the bill; Emily didn’t want any of the other ones, and when a new hero- meaning you- was mentioned, she was very excited about it. I have complete faith in your abilities, Steve; I know you can do this, and far better than anyone else. Now get your duffel bag ready; I have your costume in a special case for you,” Tony helped Steve off the couch and shooed him out of the room.

Steve quickly packed his toiletries, some clothes to sleep in and an outfit for the day after he visited little Emily. As he filled up his small duffel bag, Steve couldn’t help but notice how much he was trembling. He didn’t feel like this day was ever going to come, and until this moment he wasn’t even nervous. Knowing that he was finally going to go on his first ‘mission’ for Heroes for Hope terrified him now, however. The last thing Steve wanted was to make a mistake and ruin the child’s last few days of life by disappointing her. He took a deep breath, chanted to himself that everything would be okay, and finished preparing for his two day trip before heading off to bed. It took him an hour to fall asleep, but he replayed Tony’s words of encouragement in his head, which acted as a lullaby.

He woke up to the sound of Tony’s alarm at eight in the morning, and before he could even get up from his mattress his best friend came into his bedroom. Tony jumped on top of him, slapped him around a little bit and told him to get ready for the day ahead of him. Steve could tell Tony was excited, and even though Steve felt his heart pounding in his chest from his nerves he knew that everything would be okay. Tony believed in him, and that’s all he could ever ask for.

In less than fifteen minutes Steve was ready to go, and the two men quickly rushed out of the door and got in Tony’s brand new 2013 R8 E-Tron, which wasn’t even available to the public. Tony managed to get his hands on one, however, and like the speed demon he was he drove well over to speed limit to get to the airport. Much to Steve’s shock no cops pulled him over, and they made it to the airport in a half an hour, which normally was a forty-five minute commute from Steve’s apartment. They pulled into a private parking lot on the far corner of the airport, and a small, private jet with the charity’s name tastefully painted on the outside was waiting for him.

“Good luck, Steve. Not that you need it, I know you’re going to do a phenomenal job. All of your teachers have already excused you from everything, so you don’t need to worry about that. I’ll be out to visit you at five in the afternoon. We’ll get some coffee and you can tell me all about it,” Tony said to his best friend as they walked over to the aircraft.

“Thanks, I’ll see you tonight. I hope I do as good of a job as you think I will,” Steve replied before walking up the stairs into the aircraft, and within minutes he was in the sky, on his way to New Mexico.

When Steve arrived at Albuquerque International Sunport, he was greeted by a personal chauffer. The man took Steve’s duffel bag and the sturdy box his suit was neatly folded in, put it in the trunk of his small black Prius and drove him straight to the hospital. It was two by the time he got to his destination, and Steve had until four in the afternoon to spend time with Emily.

Two of the nurses took Steve to an empty room to change into his costume. He’d yet to see his costume, but when he opened up the suitcase and pulled it out he was pleasantly surprised. It looked exactly like his design, and he was thankful that no one had taken creative liberties with it. The fabric was wrinkle and crease resistant, and made of a fabric that reminded him of compression shorts. After he put it on, Steve took a look in the mirror in the hospital room bathroom and was pleased with how well it fit him. It was obvious that Tony had his best tailors put it together.

Now that Steve was dressed, all he had to concern himself with was Emily’s impression of him. As the nurses led him to the terminally ill little girl’s room, Steve couldn’t help but feel the butterflies in his stomach fluttering out of control. There was so much pressure on him to make this little girl’s day, and hopefully the rest of her life, and Steve wasn’t sure if he was up to the task. This is what he wanted to do more than anything, but being in a hospital setting made him uncomfortable. It reminded him of when he was a sickly young boy, constantly in and out of the hospital. Unlike Emily, however, a doctor managed to find a cure for his condition to build him up to be the strong man he was today. Sometimes Steve wondered why God saved some children and not others, but he knew if he thought about it for too long it would do more harm than good for his current assignment.

As soon as he reached Emily’s room, Steve was greeted with a warm smile and a “hello” in a high, somewhat weak voice. The little girl no longer had any hair and was wearing a striped red, white, and blue beanie on her head. She still appeared to be in good spirits, however, and she had a book, a tablet, a pen and a notebook on the tray in front of her. Her eyes widened in awe when she saw the self-selected hero walk in, and an audible “wow” escaped from her lips. The moment she welcomed him in Steve immediately felt comfortable, and the two nurses left the two alone so they could visit. With a big, sincere smile plastered on his face Steve sat down in the comfy purple chair next to her bed and began to speak.

“Hello, Emily. My name’s Captain America and I’m here to visit you for the day. What would you like to do today?” Captain America asked with a warm, kind smile, trying his best to look her in the eyes and ignore the various monitors and IVs.

“I want to read to you, and then I want you to write a story with me. It can be about our adventures as superheroes!” Emily beamed as he picked up her favorite book with her frail little hands.

Steve smiled and nodded his head in response, and he intently listened to her read. For such a young girl she was incredibly articulate, and he enjoyed every moment of it. He could see why she enjoyed reading so much, and Steve wondered if this helped her cope with her impending death. Reading helped Steve push out those thoughts when he was diagnosed with a terminal illness as a child, though luckily everything had worked out okay. Steve certainly wished he’d had someone come and visit him like this when he was a child instead of having to rely on books for an escape, however. He certainly had even more of an appreciation for Tony’s creation now, and he decided that when they met up that afternoon he’d finally ask his best friend just why he’d started the non-profit.

“That was a great story, Emily! I love American history; it’s so important, and it makes me proud that you like to read about it. You make your country happy by caring about it so much. I think your hero name should be Captain U.S.; I’ll make you a nametag you can wear!” Captain America complimented her before reaching into his utility belt for a pen and a nametag sticker.

He wrote her honorary name in red and blue and carefully placed it on her hospital gown. Emily’s dark brown eyes seemed to twinkle when she looked down at her new badge, and Steve felt his heart swell with pride. This little girl was so sweet, so enthusiastic, and so intelligent, and he couldn’t believe he was lucky enough to spend two hours with her. The time moved far too quickly, however, and before he knew it visitor hours were over and he had to leave.

“Captain U.S., it was an honor spending time with you today. You’re the biggest heroine in all of America today, you know that? We’re all so proud of you, and you’re an inspiration to everyone, especially me. You’re so brave and have a big heart, and you’ve earned a medal for your heroism,” Captain America said proudly as he pulled out a gold medal from his utility belt and put it over her neck.

“Thank you, Captain America! Before you leave, I want to write you a poem. Please don’t take him until I’m done!” Emily exclaimed hoarsely to the nurses, who granted her request.

After ten minutes she finished her poem, folding the paper neatly into the shape of a heart and handed it to him. He thanked her for the gift and gave her a long, friendly hug. Emily burst out into tears of joy, and he could feel his shoulder getting wetter by the moment. It broke his heart to have to leave her, but he didn’t have a choice. Much to his reluctance he let go of her, handed her a tissue and had her blow her nose and dry her eyes before the nurses took a photo of the two together. It was a beautiful picture even though her eyes were a bit puffy from crying, and he waved goodbye to her before leaving the room.

As he got changed back into his street clothing to meet up with Tony at some random coffee shop his chauffeur was taking him to, Steve began to cry himself. Emily was such a kind, loving soul, and to know that in a few weeks she would no longer walk this Earth was difficult for him to wrap his head around. He took a minute to kneel down at the side of the vacant bed in the room, pressed his hands together and began to pray. Steve prayed for her family, her soul, and for a pleasant last few weeks of life. He knew that even though he couldn’t change her situation, at the least he could pray for her and send her positive energy and remind her she was loved and cared about. When he finished praying, Steve got up, dusted off his knees and exited the hospital with his suit and duffel bag in tow, thankful for the opportunity Tony had given him.

***

Steve had never been happier to see Tony in his life: he wanted to thank him, ask him why he started the charity, hug him… Everything. He rushed over to Tony the moment his friend flagged him over, and he sat down in his seat quicker than he’d meant to. He blushed a little at his over-excitement, though Tony simply smirked in response.

“Had a good experience, I hope?” Tony asked as he handed Steve a chai tea latte, his treat.

“Tony, it was one of the best experiences of my life… Emily was such a sweet little girl. She read to me, we wrote a short story about us as heroes together, and she wrote me a poem. I haven’t read it yet, though… Can I?” Steve asked as he pulled the heart-shaped folded piece of paper from his pocket, and Tony nodded for him to go ahead.

Out of respect for Emily, he didn’t read it aloud. He felt that it was something special between the two of them, and Tony understood that. It was something from the bottom of her heart, and as Steve read it he was afraid he would cry again.

 

_Captain America is my friend_

_He’ll fight with me ‘til the very end_

_Forever and ever we’ll save the day_

_And everyone will say “hooray!”_

_Love, Emily_

“… Tony, what made you start Heroes for Hope? I can’t tell you enough how genius of an idea this was,” Steve put on a serious face to prevent himself from crying, and after a long silence Tony began to speak.

“Well, when I was a little kid… Ten years old I think, my mom was in the hospital. My dad wouldn’t tell me what was wrong, but I looked at her charts and she had a pretty bad miscarriage. She almost bled to death, so she was resting at the hospital for a few days after she got a blood transfusion and they gave her some antibiotics to prevent infection. Since my dad never gave a shit about anything I did I walked all over the hospital by myself. No one stopped me, surprisingly, but whatever.

“Anyway, I wound up in the children’s wing of the hospital, and I saw a lot of kids in rough shape. Most of ‘em were younger than I was at the time, and there was one little boy that stuck out to me. He wasn’t much younger than me, but he was very sick. He had thin blonde hair, bright blue eyes, and was skinny as a rail. He basically looked like the runt of the litter. I saw him every single day, walking around and holding onto his wheelie IV stand for support. The nurses let him walk around for a few minutes alone; must’ve been a pretty responsible kid, but that’s not the point.

“He was always carrying a little stuffed doll of Powdered Toast Man, and I could tell he loved superheroes, no matter how ridiculous they were. I spent a lot of time watching him, but I could never bring myself to talk to him… No one ever visited him though, and the other kids in the ward avoided him like the plague. I really regret never talking to him, and this is my way of making up for my mistake. I know I can’t go back in time and become friends with him, but I hope he got better and maybe one day becomes a part of my non-profit. It’ll probably never happen, but I’ve thought about him almost every day for years, and I hope I see him again someday,” Tony answered, and Steve couldn’t cover the look of shock on his face.

***

While Tony and Steve continued to talk, two girls at a table not far away from them were drinking caramel frappes and not so stealthily staring at them. The older woman, who had light brown hair and hazel eyes, tried to avoid looking at the two men, while the younger woman with dark brown hair and greyish-blue eyes made no attempt to hide it.

“They’re really cute together, Jane. I think we should say something. It’s obvious that they’re totally in love with each other even if they don’t know it yet,”  the dark haired young woman stated, not taking her eyes away from the two men.

“Darcy, I really don’t think they’d appreciate us getting involved… Besides, how do we know what their relationship status is right now? What if we ruin it for them? You can’t just say everything that’s on your mind, especially not to strangers,” Jane sighed in response; they’d been having this small argument back and forth for several minutes and she was growing tired of it.

“You know what?  Fine. Write them a little note on the sleeve of your drink. Here’s a pen and a highlighter. Go wild,” Jane finally relented, and Darcy let out a small squeal of joy as she snatched the writing utensils away and began jotting down a message.

***

“Tony, that was me. I was actually considered terminally ill at that time, and I was the only one that was supposed to die there. I had a rare auto-immune disease, and they gave me a month to live. But Doctor Erskine, a famous pediatric researcher at the time, came up with a treatment for it. I was the first one they tried the experimental treatment on, and I lived… As I reached puberty the effects were boosted, and now I have no trace of my childhood illness, which is why I’m so strong today. I can’t believe tha-” Steve was interrupted by the two women, who quickly placed something on the table before rushing out of the café.

Tony flipped it around so they could both read it:

 

 

The two looked at the cardboard sleeve for a moment, and then looked at each other. That feeling in the air Steve remembered fondly came back, and it was stronger than ever. With a tender smile, Tony put his hand on top of his best friend’s and looked him in his beautiful blue eyes. The contact made Steve’s heart rate increase, and he held his breath in anticipation of what Tony was about to say. He just prayed it was something good.

“I agree with them. I’ve liked you for a long time, but I didn’t want to say anything until I was over Bruce and knew for sure whether or not my feelings were because I was vulnerable. They’re not, Steve. I like you for _you_ , not because of the fact that you’ve been here for me. Well, that’s something about you I like but that’s not the main reason. What do you say, Steve? Want to take their advice?” Tony asked with his usual cocky smirk.

“Yes, Tony. It’s what I’ve wanted for a long time,” Steve responded, and the two men interlocked their fingers, finally expressing their true feelings for one another.

After the months of patience, compassion, and friendship, Steve finally had what he wanted, and so much more. He was doing well in school, became a volunteer at the most successful non-profit for-children organization in the country, but most importantly, he had Tony’s love.

 

 


End file.
